


Don't Believe in Love

by alovinggirl



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-27
Updated: 2017-11-27
Packaged: 2019-02-07 13:28:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12842169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alovinggirl/pseuds/alovinggirl
Summary: Matthew knew Amelia wouldn’t answer her phone. He didn’t care. He longed for her voice and useless advice.He settled for pretending.





	Don't Believe in Love

The phone rang once. Twice. Thrice. After the fourth ring, the operator chimed the familiar phrase the number you have dialed has been disconnected or is no longer in service, please check the number and try the call again.

Matthew kept the cellphone on his ear as the operator hung up on him. He didn’t need to redial the number. He knew Amelia wouldn’t answer her phone. She hadn’t answered the phone since she ran away three years ago. He wondered why he bothered but then, there was always the small hope that maybe she would answer this time. It crushed him when she didn’t. He longed for her voice and useless advice. Today, more than ever, he wanted her to answer. 

“What’s up lil’ bro?”

He settled for pretending.

Matthew smiled softly. 

“I’m having pancakes in Elizaveta’s Diner.”

At 10am on a Monday, the diner was empty. Matthew forgot to set his alarm and woke up late, missing his first class. He decided that if he was late, he’d at least get a decent breakfast. He took his usual seat at the last booth. Elizabeta made an unreadable face at him before taking his order. When she brought his pancakes, she brought him a milkshake on the house.

“Mister, model student skipping class and eating someone else’s pancakes? What’s next? Weed? You’ll give our old Uncle Franny a heart attack.”

“He’s not that old,” Matthew said in a hard tone.

Francis was young. He was 25 when he took Matthew and Amelia in, only ten years older than them. Thirty-five wasn’t old.

“You slept with him again didn’t you.”

Matthew tensed. There was a hard edge to her tone. The same she used when Ivan riled her up. His mind went in two directions, and he decided to go with the most disgusting one.

“Francis?”

“Ew, no. That’s gross. I’m talking about Gilbert.”

“What about him?”

“Really Mattie? Really? You gonna try that on your twinsie.”

“Try what?”

Amelia dragged out a long frustrated sigh. 

“It doesn’t matter how hard you try to hide it Mattie. I’m your twinkie. I know the difference between Matthew, my bamf quiet ass bro, and Birdie, the love-sick idiot who let Gilbert fuck him again.”

Matthew clenched his jaw.

“I didn’t let him fuck me.”

“Okay, how ‘bout this? I’ma tell you story and you’re gonna stop me if I’m wrong... It’s a Friday night. You’re home alone. Uncle Franny is gone, probably banging some hot chick from out of town, when there’s a knock on the door. 

It’s Gilbert. You know you shouldn’t open the door. You open it anyways.

You let him kiss you, touch you. You pretend for this moment, he loves you. But like a dream, he’s gone in the morning. After cleaning up, you go to Elizaveta’s Diner to remind yourself why he’ll never be yours and to buy some breakfast. 

You know you’re just a late night booty call. You know it, but you can’t stop loving him. 

So you call me, hoping I will answer knowing I won’t. You don’t care. You need someone to talk to. You need to believe that someone in this world loves you, but love doesn’t exist.”

Matthew lets out a shaky breath.

“No, no. That’s not why I-”

“I might have loved you. Back then.”

Tears well up in Matthew’s eyes and his hands began to tremble.

“You’re lying.”

“I’m not. How could I? You held my hand when mom had a bad day. You cried with me when she ran away. You laughed with me when I still had bad aim. I loved you Mattie. I loved you before we were born. You were my only friend. I trusted you, and you betrayed me. It’d be a miracle if I forgave you, and an even bigger one if I still loved you.”

“And Francis,” his voice cracked.

“Francis never proved he loved us. He wanted to think he was better than mom, but the only difference was that mom never deluded herself into believing she cared. Francis did. For a while, we did too. We both know better now.”

Matthew gripped his cell phone tightly. His shoulders shook as he began to sob. He hung his head when his voice grew louder. Elizabeta rushed towards him and pulled his crying face onto her chest. She rubbed his back soothingly.

“What’s wrong little Birdie? What’s wrong?” she asked anxiously.

He didn’t question why she knew the secret pet name. He wasn’t surprised. Of course Gilbert would go parading around bragging about his latest booty call. Of course he would. Matthew was an idiot. Their mother never loved him. Gilbert won’t ever love him. Francis only pretends to love him. And he drove the only person who ever did away. He was a stupid, stupid, idiot.

“Don’t give up Mattie. I might still love you, or I might not. Neither of us know. Leave that stupid town. Leave Gilbert and Francis, and come find me. Find me and stay with me forever.”

“Happy birthday Amy,” he choked out.

Elizabeta’s arms tightened, locking him in place. He knew what she was thinking. He’s a Bonnefoy and Bonnefoy’s don’t solve their problems, they run from them. For once, he wants to prove them all right.

“Happy Birthday Mattie.”

**Author's Note:**

> Elizabeta knows about the pet name b/c Gilbert is an idiot who is deeply in love with Matthew, but doesn’t know how to make the transition from friend with benefits to significant other. 
> 
> And Francis genuinely cares about the twins, he fought his sister in court in order to have their guardianship. He got the guardianship during a shitty time though. Jeanne, his wife, had just passed away and his sister went missing. He dealt with the emotional stress by overworking and never once allowed himself a release. It wasn’t until Amelia ran away when he realized just how much of a distance he put b/w himself and the twins. 
> 
> Francis really struggles to get Matthew to open up to him. Matthew blames himself for Amelia’s disappearance since he was the last person to talk to her and they fought. It wasn’t Matthew’s fault though. It was a culmination of lots of other things that made Amelia come to that drastic decision. She believes she 1000% deserved it for her bad mood that day and regrets she didn’t tell Matthew good-bye.


End file.
